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The Milkmaid
Cheesypoof
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 8
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 Ideas for new forums |
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Hi again 
Yep, it's The Milkmaid again.
Now that you've made it clear that you consider us to be in the wrong for NOT posting on your forums, you're going to see a lot more of us!
I'm kicking things off with some suggestions to liven up your forum.
First off, you need some kind of area where your members can just hang out and chat. Jokes threads, funny stories, funny retals, etc... - wacky central.
Then, you need an area somewhere where you can talk strategy. Share ideas, tips, what works for you on the field, what doesn't work.
Maybe those that DON'T retal a fireball with two land attacks could talk about how much more successful their adventures have been 
You probably want some kind of intel thread, where you post information you have on other players/alliances. You never know when that might come in handy...
What about a thread about how you came to choose your ign?
eg. "I chose my ign because it describes me so well" - thanks for that Schuyler.
Alrighty. Any other ideas for new forums?
Let's wake this place up!
How is it that in an hour I've managed to claim a spot in the top three posters in YOUR alliance's forum?
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Skype ID: claire.hennekam
I refuse to fight a battle of wits with an unarmed person |
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| Sun Jun 15, 2008 3:59 am |
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The Milkmaid
Cheesypoof
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 8
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| JOKES & OTHER FUNNIES |
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Brought to you by the wacky folks at the Milk & Cheese Alliance...
What do you call cheese that's not yours?
Nacho cheese 
What do you call a cow spying on another cow?
A steak out
Do you think cows look at a field and say : "I can't believe I ate the whole thing"?
What goes "ooo ooo ooo"?
A cow with no lips
Did you hear the one about the clairvoyant cow?
She could see into the future and the pasture.
Why do they call it "PMS"?
Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.
What do you call a cow without legs?
Ground beef
How do you get bull to quit charging?
Take away his credit card.
I had a friend who wanted to open a factory making cheese. I asked him what type of cheese he was thinking of as all the popular ones were already being made. He thought about it for a while then decided to import cheese instead.
A week later I saw him again.
"How's the cheese importing coming along?" I asked
"Great." He says, "I'm importing them from Israel."
"What do you call them?" I asked.
Came the reply "Cheeses of Nazareth!"
Thank you, thank you...I'll be here all week 
_________________
Skype ID: claire.hennekam
I refuse to fight a battle of wits with an unarmed person |
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| Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:07 am |
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The Milkmaid
Cheesypoof
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 8
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| Potential Merger??? |
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Well, things have been pretty hostile between our two alliances of late...but I came across this website today and had to wonder...
http://excaliburcheese.com/
...is there really hope for a merger one day???
Oh, my...I crack me up.
_________________
Skype ID: claire.hennekam
I refuse to fight a battle of wits with an unarmed person |
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| Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:09 am |
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The Milkmaid
Cheesypoof
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 8
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| What is M&CA's secret??? |
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I think it's probably fair to suggest that M&CA has the *ahem* upper hand in this conflict of late, so one has to wonder...
...how do we do it??? What's our secret?
Well, since you all seem to be nice folks (with a couple of notable, remarkable exceptions), we'll let you in on something.
"The month of June is National Dairy Month!"
What is National Dairy Month?
National Dairy month is when we are all reminded the value of drinking milk for our good health and how important dairy products are. National Dairy month is promoted pretty heavily through retail companies running ads for dairy products. It's also a major time health professionals promote good health as well.
Ahhhhhhhhhh....
....couldn't resist.
_________________
Skype ID: claire.hennekam
I refuse to fight a battle of wits with an unarmed person |
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| Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:15 am |
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Cheese Niblet
Member
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 5
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Now now, I don't want you to think the Milkmaid is the only hysterically funny cheese aficionado we have......there are more of us. Yes, your luck has changed! It's brighter in here already 
Why does a milking stool have only three legs?
Because the cow has the udder
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows.
"What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.
"Not a bunch, herd", her friend replied.
"Heard of what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Of course I've heard of cows."
"No, a cow herd."
"What do I care what a cow heard. I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
*c'mon now.....don't tell me that didn't make you giggle just a little bit*
What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
Milk of Amnesia
Why don't cows have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry
(don't point fingers now little niblet....it's rude to point!)
What do call a cow that has just had a calf?
Decalfenated
Did you hear that NASA recently launched a bunch of Holsteins into low Earth orbit?
They called it the Herd Shot 'Round The World
Boom, boom......thank you very much.....tips are welcome (get off the stage is not considered a worthy tip)
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Would you stop beating me up Schuyler? |
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| Sun Jun 15, 2008 4:45 am |
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GOT MILK?
Cheesypoof
Joined: 16 Jun 2008
Posts: 6
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| my 2 cents! |
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I would suggest a link to a copy of SUN TZU's Art of War.......then you guys might stand a chance!
And now for some more Cow Jokes!!
1. What does a cow sound like when it cries?
MOOHOOHOO!!
2. What do you call a cow with a crown?
Dairy Queen!!
3. How does a cow get to the mooooon?
it flies through udder space!
4. What happens when you talk to a cow?
it goes in one ear and out the udder!
5. Where do cows live in apartments?
MOO YORK CITY!
6. What characteristic do we get from drinking milk?
it makes us a-mooo-sing!
7. What is a cow's favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna
8. What does a cow like to do by a campfire?
Roast Mooshmallows!
9. What do you get when you cross the singer of "Beat It" and a cow?
Moochael Jackson!
10. What do you call a cow that plays the banjo?
A MOOOOsician!
Thank you Thank you I'll be here all week.......no I couldn't possibly accept your too kind your too kind! lol
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Schuyler hurt my internet feelings! |
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| Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:45 am |
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Kleaver
Site Admin
Joined: 28 Mar 2008
Posts: 87
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Oh. My. God.
Its extra ironic that all the jokes are cheesy (badump bump).
you should have a SPAM avatar like me
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| Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:44 am |
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GOT MILK?
Cheesypoof
Joined: 16 Jun 2008
Posts: 6
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Well you have to the Cheese in with the Milk somewhere
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Schuyler hurt my internet feelings! |
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| Mon Jun 16, 2008 10:30 pm |
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Cheese Niblet
Member
Joined: 15 Jun 2008
Posts: 5
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We do aim to please Kleaver! The cheesier the better. Life is better with Dairy.
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Would you stop beating me up Schuyler? |
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| Tue Jun 17, 2008 5:20 am |
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Amooosing
Cheesypoof
Joined: 17 Jun 2008
Posts: 2
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?
-Use a cow-culator.
What game do cows play at parties?
-Moosical chairs.
What do you get from Alaskan cows?
-Ice cream.
Why do cows like being told jokes?
-Because they like to be amoosed.
What is a cow's favorite musical note?
-Beef flat.
What do you call a cow that can't give milk?
-A milk dud.
What was the bull doing in the field with his eyes closed?
-Bull dozing.
What do you call a cow in an earthquake?
-A milkshake.
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| Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:23 pm |
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Time Bomb
Noobie
Joined: 17 Jun 2008
Posts: 3
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Q:� What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor?
A:� Ground Beef
Q:� What do you call a cow with no front legs?
A:� Lean Beef
Q:� What do you call a cow with no legs at all?
A:� Ground beef
Q:� What is a cow's favorite lunch meat?
A:� Bullogna
Q:� What do cows get when they are sick?
A:� Hay Fever
Q:� What are the spots on black-and-white cows?Q:� What do you call a cow who just recently had ��
� �� its baby?
A:� Decalfinated
Q:� Why do cows wear bells?
A:� Their horns don't work.
A city man was tooling down a country road when his car sputtered to a complete stop near a field filled with cows. The driver, getting out to see what was the matter, noticed one of the cows looking at him. "I believe it's your radiator," said the cow. The man nearly jumped right out of his city slicker britches! He ran to the nearest farmhouse and knocked on the door. "A cow just gave me advice about my car!" he shouted, waving his arms franticly back toward the field. The farmer nonchalantly leaned out beyond the door frame to glance down the field. "The cow with two big black spots on it?" the farmer asked slowly. "Yes! Yes! That's the one!" the excited man replied. "Oh. Well, that's Ethel," the farmer said, turning back to the man. "Don't pay any attention to her. She doesn't know a thing about cars."
Q:� Why don't cows have any money?
A:� Because the farmers milk them dry.
Q:� What do you call a cow that doesn't � give milk?
A:� An udder failure.
Q:� What do cows do for entertainment?
A:� They go to the mooooovies.
Q:� How do you make a milkshake?
A:� Give a cow a pogo stick.
Q:� What band is a cow favorite?
A:� Moody Blues
Q:� What do you call a grumpy cow?
A:� Moo-dy
Q:� Where do cows go in the afterlife?
A:� Moo Moo Land
�� Famous philosophy, done for cows:
� � Nietzsche: To moo is to be.
� � Sartre:� To be is to moo.
� � Sinatra:� Moo be moo be moo.
Q:� Where do cows like to ride on trains?
A:� In the cow-boose.
Q:� What do cows get when they do all their � � � � � � � � � � � � �� chores?
A:� Mooney.
Q:� What did one dairy cow say to another?
A:� Got milk?
Q:� How to you know that cows will be in heaven?
A:� It's a place of udder delight.
Q:� What do you call a cow that has 3 legs?
A:� Lean beef
Q:� What do you call a cow that has 2 legs?
A:� Side of beef
Q:� What do you call a cow that has 1 leg?
A:� Steak
Q:� What do you call a cow that has no legs?
A:� Ground beef
� � A bum steer is a worthless bull.
� � Ground beef is a cow sitting down.
� � A stockholder is a corral for cattle.
� Moscow doesn't make as much milk as Pa's � � � � � � � � � �� cow.
Q:� When is a farmer like a magician?
A:� When he turns his cow into pasture.
Q:� Why is a barn so noisy?
A:� All the cows have horns.
Q:� What did one cow say to the other?
A: � Nothing silly, cow's don't talk.
Q:� What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A:� Laughing stock.
Q:� Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain?
A:� He's got no beef.
Q:� What animals do you bring to bed?
A:� Your calves.
The farmer had been taken so many times by the local car dealer that when the dealer wanted to buy a cow, the farmer priced it to him like this:
Basic cow, $200; two-tone exterior, $45; extra stomach $75; product storage compartment, $60;
dispensing device, four spigots at $10 each, $40;
genuine cowhide upholstery, $125; dual horns, $15; automatic fly swatter, $35. Total = $595.
� Q:� Where does a cow stop to drink?
� A:� The milky way!
� Q:� What does an invisible man drink?
� A:� Evaporated milk!
� Q:� Where do cows go for lunch?
� A:� The calf-eteria.
� Q:� Where do cows go on dates?
� A:� The moo-vies!
� Q:� What do you call a tired cow?
� A:� Milked out!
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Schuyler There are some good people in your alliance! |
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| Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:15 pm |
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